The Spy Who Shagged Me

Can somebody please tell me why this story isn't HUGE?

White House faces spy scandal over stolen documents

The White House said it was cooperating with a spy probe into a former US Marine who allegedly provided the Philippines with classified documents stolen from Vice President Dick Cheney's office.

"It's an ongoing investigation. We will cooperate fully," said White House spokesman Scott McClellan.

If by cooperate fully you mean we will tell you absolutely nothing and make sure anyone involved holds onto his job, gets a promotion and/or receives a medal of freedom.