October 31, 2006
Here's a Video
...for those of you who think it's time to fucking rock:
(John K. & Tenacious D hilariously collaborate once again. Definitely NSFW.)
October 29, 2006
October 28, 2006
Bill O'Reilly: Dumber Than a Bag of Rocks
"What a Dumb F..."
The Dixie Chicks: Shut Up & Sing Trailer:
And here's the spot that NBC refuses to air:
(Click to watch)
October 27, 2006
Tonight on Letterman
O'Reilly joins Dave for more abuse (taped last night):
Source: Page Six (hence the ridiculously slanted lines like "the liberal-leaning host" and the stuff about Dave "shaking his fist and waving his arms" -- yeah, Letterman's a total Terrorist-Loving, Commie Loony).
... things go downhill fast as O'Reilly sits down and jokingly presents the liberal-leaning host with a plastic sword to do battle and holds up a plastic shield to defend himself.
An irritated Letterman cracks, "Oh, that's nice, that's cute, you come out with toys . . . Am I right about one thing: You guys over there at Fox and guys like Rush Limbaugh, you guys know it's all just a goof, right? You're just horsing around. You're doing it 'cause you know it'll be entertaining?" Letterman adds he's never seen O'Reilly's show because, "I dial up Fox and it's always 'The Simpsons.' "
O'Reilly tries to lighten the mood by telling the audience he and Letterman are "on the same bowling league" and asks whether he'd appear on "Dancing With the Stars."
"Bonehead!" snaps Letterman, who then starts shaking his fist and waving his arms at O'Reilly as the subject turns to the war in Iraq. "Let me ask you a question - was there more heinous, more dangerous violence taking place [before America invaded] Iraq, or is there more heinous, dangerous violence taking place now in Iraq?"
"Oh, stop it," O'Reilly scolds the host. "Saddam Hussein slaughtered 300,000 to 400,000 people, all right, so knock it off . . . It isn't so black and white, Dave - it isn't, 'We're a bad country. Bush is an evil liar.' That's not true."
"I didn't say he was an evil liar," Letterman shoots back. "You're putting words in my mouth, just the way you put artificial facts in your head!"
Letterman admits he hasn't read O'Reilly's new book, "Culture War," because "I looked at it. I said, 'What is it, a book on sailing?' "
Checking his watch to signal an end to the insult-a-thon, Letterman sarcastically quips, "Oh, gosh, where has the time gone?" He adds: "I have no idea what I'm talking about - but I don't think you do, either."
October 26, 2006
Tall Hands = Big Beards
Blacula Can't Get a Drink, a Cab or a Break in this Cruel Town
Mario Van Peebles stars in the new Gnarls Barkley video, "Who Cares?"
Orange&Blue is the New Black
(Editor's Note: I swear, this is the last Mets post until pitchers and catchers report next Spring.)
So, there I was last Thursday, wearing my brand new Mr. Met jersey, making my way to work on the morning of Game 7 of the NLCS, when I was accosted by a reporter from ABC/Channel 7 news:
"Are you a Mets fan?" he asked.Anyway, the reporter asked me what I thought the Mets chances were and of course I said Game 7 was in the bag (I also picked Gore and Kerry to win in '00 & '04 but to my knowledge, the St. Louis Cardinals did not cheat to win the NLCS). Then, he asked me if my boss was okay with my Mets shirt...and that's the answer Channel 7 decided to run with, making me seem like some retarded reject from Project Runway:
"No," I answered (because I'm a wiseass).
"But you're wearing the shirt?!?!?"
"I was just joking."
(Click to watch)
(Apparently, Mets fans may soon be able to legally marry in the state of New Jersey.)
Ultimately, I guess I'm most proud of the fact that, a) I used the phrase "The Yankees were spanked" and b) they got a great shot of my Mr. Met shirt (available at Moonlight Graham) with my "No W" pin:
October 25, 2006
Get Yer Dirty Paws Off Our Stem Cells
Fair but not Balanced, fuckers (and yes, I mean people like you Patricia ""I crapped on the table" Heaton and especially the big, fat idiot himself, Rush Limbaugh).
October 24, 2006
October 20, 2006
October 19, 2006
Habeas Corpus: R.I.P.
Olbermann interviews legal scholar Jonathan Turley plus a Special Comment from Keith:
"It couldn’t be more significant. And the strange thing is, we’ve become sort of constitutional couch potatoes. I mean, the Congress just gave the president despotic powers, and you could hear the yawn across the country as people turned to, you know, Dancing with the Stars. I mean, it’s otherworldly." - Jonathan Turley
October 18, 2006
Beck with a Budget
A new Beck video (for Cell Phone's Dead), not shot on DV:
(Directed by Michel Gondry)
No Joy In Metsville
As you've probably already figured out, it ain't easy being a Mets fan (it's probably even harder to be a Mets player). So, as a consolation to all of you out there who are feeling "our" pain, I give you this poem from the Modern Fictional, Non-Fiction Baseball Classic, Believeniks!:
Innings
Into whose blackness double plays tumble
And the boos!
Boos echoing
Off the upper deck like shrikes
The out
Rising like smoke, like a
Wrapper swirling
Mustard-stained, to the foot
Of the Whitestone.
Failed bunts
Third strikes
Nerve-flaying blown saves.
Years later I
Encounter them in the stats --
Stats dry and bodiless,
Yet hold the book at arm's length
See the shape?
They reveal the shadow of a skull.
A Met grins.
P.S. ("this is what part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R were eliminated") - There'll be light posting this and next week (too much work, going out of town and, perhaps, just a little pre-election Republican-Scandal-Fatigue).
October 16, 2006
First CBGB, Now Tower Records/Video
My neighborhood appears to be closing, most likely to make room for more NYU buildings.
Tower has announced bankruptcy and is currently having an "Everything Must Go!" sale. I took advantage of the video sale this weekend (half price for used DVDs) and picked up, among other things, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang starring Robert Downey Jr. and Val Kilmer. Me & the Ms. watched it the other night and while it wasn't "great" great, it was pretty damn entertaining and contained some amazing lines. For example:
"Gay" Perry: Look up idiot in the dictionary. You know what you'll find?Guess you had to be there. Hey! You can be there. Here's a (for some reason censored) scene:
Harry: A picture of me?
Perry: No! The definition of idiot. Which you fucking are!
and
Harry (narrating): Don't worry, I saw Lord of the Rings. I'm not going to end this 17 times.
and
Perry: Merry Christmas, sorry I fucked you over.
Harry: No problem. Don't quit your gay job.
As for CBGB, James Wolcott has composed a nice, little requiem.
Has Chevy Been Bought By George Soros?
Their new ad campaign features a song my John Mellencamp ("Our Country") and images of cars, bikinis, hula hoops, Rosa Parks, conscientious objector Muhammad Ali*, the Vietnam War, hippie protestors, Nixon leaving on his helicopter after resigning, Martin Luther King's March on Washington, Nascar, Katrina and then the obligatory 9/11 images.
(Click to watch)
I do believe the pendulum is finally swinging back to the left.
* "I Ain't Got No Quarrel With The VietCong...
No VietCong Ever Called Me Nigger" — Muhammad Ali, 1966
"That's Me In The Corner"
...losing my religion at Shea with my nephew Will and some F.O.G. (friends of George, the man responsible for our amazing seats).
(Click to watch)
As you can see, I was taking the proceedings very seriously, despite the fact that we had a two run lead. I just had the feeling that two runs would not be enough for our erratic closer, Billy "Armando" Wagner. And, of course, as it turned out, the game was tied by the time Billy was given the ball to completely blow the game for the home team. (Note to Billy: You might want to think about losing your entrance song, Enter Sandman -- you can steal it here, Metallica/Napster fans -- it just doesn't seem to have the consistent, desired effect on your opponents anymore. Just sayin'...)
Anyway, even though we lost, it was a great night at Shea. We got to see Carlos Delgado belt two big home runs and watch Jose, Jose, Jose, Jose...Jose, Jose Reyes break out of his excitable slump and go 3-4.
Sadly, Nicole (goddess of beer and hot dogs) was not in our section Friday night. Instead we were treated to this:
Her lipstick made quite an impression on my nephew.
We were also treated to Jon Stewart throwing out the first pitch:
...Chad Bradford knuckle-dragging his way through two innings:
...and, unfortunately, Tony LaRusso's pants:
However, the highlight of the night may have come before my nephew and I even left Manhattan. As we were walking toward the subway, some guy asked us if we were Mets fans (it was a pretty good guess considering the fact that Will was wearing a Mets shirt and I was wearing both a Mets sweatshirt and ball cap). It turns out that Pedro (yes, that Pedro) was around the corner buying perfume for his lady at Bond No. 9. So we waited outside for about 10 minutes
...and he eventually came out and graciously agreed to take a picture
(note the excercise ball in Pedro's hand)
...and sign my ball cap.
After that, the rest of the evening was gravy.
Mets in six...
October 15, 2006
October 12, 2006
1 Down, 7 to Go
Attention Mets Fans: Is there anyone out there who has a recording of Game 2 of the Mets/Dodgers series? Apparently, yours truly, Krup, was on camera for about 3 seconds in the 3rd inning. I'd love a copy of the inning -- you know, for posterity. Leave a comment if you're out there.
October 11, 2006
October 10, 2006
October 09, 2006
I'm Glad We Don't Have Kids
This is one block from where we live:
What do you do? Avoid it and walk 8 blocks out of your way to go to your favorite restaurant around the corner? Or do you just walk by and pretend to ignore it.
What if your 5 year old daughter starts asking questions?
Daddy? Why is that lady naked?And, of course, the next day you get a call from her Kindergarten principal who tells you that after graham crackers and apple juice, your daughter took off all her clothes because she was too hot.
Well honey, she was tired and wanted to take a nap. But it was too hot so she took off her clothes.
Or what if your 15 year old son looks at it and asks,
Hey Dad, isn't that the chick who dates the ex-Libertines lead singer?
You have to tell him the truth, that yes, indeed, that's Kate Moss, the on-and-off girlfriend of crackhead Pete Doherty. And you know that inside your son is thinking if he begins to emulate the Pete Doherty's of the world, he'll be able to score the hot chicks at school.
So this is why we have dogs. No questions.
Meet George Bush's "Cultural Advisor"
Stephen "Bio-Dome" Baldwin
I kid you not.
Actual quote from Stephen's book:
"God has called me to go and make disciples of the youth of America. That is what I am going to try to do, and if you try to stop me I am going to break your face."Now imagine him letting out a huge belch after dictating this un-Christlike gem.
October 08, 2006
Lets Go Mets!
Meanwhile, A-Rod (a true rod, reduced to batting 8th!)) and the hapless Yanks are sent packing.
October baseball! Gotta love it.
Count the Copyright Violations!
(Click to watch "Gimme the Mermaid")
From the forthcoming Negativland DVD, Our Favorite Things. Animation created and/or stolen by Naked Rabbit.
(Warning: Clip contains nude men wrestling.)
October 06, 2006
The Protector, The Lookouter, The Focuser, The Connector, The Educator, The Explainer, The Handshaker, The Smiler, The Achiever of Things
George Bush explains his job courtesy of The Daily Show. Brilliant (The Daily Show, not the Preznit).
Photoblogging The Mets
I had the pleasure of attending last night's 4-1 Mets victory over the Dodgers. I had the even greater pleasure of sitting in the 7th row behind the Dodgers' dugout. Here are a few pics from the evening:
The view from the 7th row.
Hey, our seats were as good as Tony Roberts' and Ron Leibman's. All I could keep thinking was, "Twins, Max."
Nicole: Box Seat Beer & Hot Dog Goddess
Mr. Met: The best mascot in the world. Who cannot love a guy with a giant baseball head?
Full moon over Shea Stadium. A perfect night for baseball. If Ernie Banks had been there, he would have said, "Let's play two!"
Oh my god! Billy Wagner only has one leg!!!!
Don't worry kids. Billy's alright. And he actually had a 1-2-3 ninth inning. A minor Mets' miracle.
Mets Win!!!
Game over. Back in my neighborhood.
October 05, 2006
Colbert's Gonna Hate This Video
(Click to watch)
1000BPM from the new Beck CD/DVD, The Information. You can download most of the other videos over at Shots Ring Out.
And Completely Apropos of Nothing...
It just happened to be the next clip after the Daily Show piece on YouTube. I watched it. I laughed. And now, I share it. It's that simple.
Demetri Martin's "Clearification"
(Click to watch Demetri's webisodes. You'll be very glad you did.)
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